Discipleship 101: The Family of God - Mark 3:31-35

 Discipleship 101: The Family of God

Mark 3:31-35

Introduction: We had a great time visiting some friends from our former church in Maine…  We stayed with a couple of different church families. It was really good to see those friends, part of our church family for over ten years. Even so, what did we say on our return? “It is good to be home!” We are part of a family here as well.  Yes, our daughter and son-in-law, and grandchildren live nearby. But the sermon title today is “The Family of God.” God has designed the church, the local community of faith that gathers for worship, Bible study, prayer, and fellowship. We bear each other’s burdens. We pray for one another. We encourage and equip each other for reaching our world with the Gospel. God would use us to bring those in our “sphere of influence” into His forever family. [Remember: 95% of those who believe come to faith primarily through an existing relationship.] That is God’s plan. As we have said before, “There is no plan ‘b’”!  In today’s passage, we see Jesus’ “birth family” come to see him, and we hear Jesus teach about “The Family of God.”

       A note about the context. Pastor Tom showed from Matthew’s account the scene where the Jewish leaders of that generation showed their unbelief by accusing Jesus of casting out demons by the power of Satan. Right before that scene, Mark gives us a little detail back in 3:21 before our text. There we read,

“And when his family [His own people] heard of it, they went out to seize him [take custody of Him]; for they were saying, ‘He is out of Him mind.’”

Your translation likely says “His family” instead of “His own people.” That translation is really an interpretation based on today’s passage.  I don’t feel confident in making that jump. Read Mary’s prayer, and the faith and understanding she expresses in the early part of Luke. Clearly, she believed! She didn’t know how the story would unfold, but there is no question that she knew Jesus was the Christ. His younger [half] brothers are another story, they didn’t “believe” it seems until after the resurrection (Jn 7:5; cf. Acts 1:14).  Even so, I don’t think we can jump from v.21 to v.31 and assume this was a “family intervention.” That may have been his brothers’ intention, if so, Mary may have been there as a voice of reason. We can say for certain that at least it was a family visit. And Jesus uses the occasion to teach his disciples, and us, about the family of God.

The BIG Idea: Trusting and obeying God shows that by God’s grace we have been born into His “forever family.”

I. A wrong assumption: Being born into a God-fearing family doesn’t guarantee that we will have saving faith in God. Christianity isn’t a birthright! Our relationship with God is not inherited from our birth parents but is attained through the new birth (31,32). It has been said that “God has no grandchildren, only children!” Take a look at Mark 3:31…

³¹ And his mother and his brothers came, and standing outside they sent to him and called him.  ³² And a crowd was sitting around him, and they said to him, "Your mother and your brothers are outside, seeking you." 

        We have different realities and ideas about “family” relationships among us. I was talking with someone on our trip to Maine who expressed his thankfulness that his children and grandchildren are all right there in the Boothbay region. Some of you too have children and grandchildren nearby. Others are spread out… around the country, or even around the world. Our church is unique in my experience in that several families have multiple generations that still call LBC home. It was common in Israel for families to be nearby. Not surprising since God gave the land to the tribes of Israel as an inheritance, and it was passed down from generation to generation. Families were big, and often, they were close. That is important background to Jesus’ teaching here.

      “Family” was important to life in Israel…  and family is an integral aspect of God’s design for humans… Much of the teaching in the Bible points to our responsibility to respect God’s design for the family: husbands are to love their wives as Christ loved the church; wives are to respect and follow the leadership of their husband in the Lord, parents are to protect and teach their children the way of the Lord. Children are to honor their mother and father.  I am giving that background to make the point that this visit from Jesus’ “family” would not have been unexpected… It’s what families do! We don’t know how long it had been since they had been together, and the twenty-mile trip from Nazareth to Capernaum would not have been a big obstacle—they were family after all.

       It is also true that God had chosen the Jews to have a special place in His program – and that God still has a future plan for Israel (the extended family of Abraham!): a blindness in part has come upon Israel until the fullness of the gentiles comes in. As pastor Tom asked two weeks ago, what does that word “until” imply? There will be a future turning of Israel to Messiah Jesus. At the same time, John the Baptist warned the leaders not to presume that their lineage guarantees their standing with God…

 ^“And do not presume to say to yourselves, 'We have Abraham as our father,' for I tell you, God is able from these stones to raise up children for Abraham…” (Matthew 3:9).

The Jews could not presume on their physical descent from Abraham to put them in good standing with God. They too needed to believe! The same is true in our context. Some of you have a long history in this local body — generations. But our physical birth into a believing family doesn’t guarantee our eternity. We must be born again, personally trusting in Christ alone for our salvation. It is through the new birth that we become part of the family of God!

       In speaking to the importance of our spiritual family in the Lord, the local church, we should not assume that the Lord is implying that we should not value the family that we were born into or in which we grew up. Even at the end of His life, Jesus made sure His mother was cared for… As he hung on the cross, He spoke to the beloved disciple and to Mary his mother, “Behold your son …behold your mother” (John 19:26,27). Clearly family is important to the Lord, so much so that when he gave the ten commandments, one of them was the “suggestion” that we “put up with our parents” right? No, it was the commandment to honor our father and mother!  We have an enlightening scene that is recorded only in Luke’s Gospel, when Jesus was twelve years old. The family had traveled to Jerusalem for Passover which was their custom. As the caravan of the extended family packed up to return to Nazareth we pick up the story in Luke 2:43-49…

…And when the feast was ended, as they were returning, the boy Jesus stayed behind in Jerusalem. His parents did not know it, ⁴⁴ but supposing him to be in the group they went a day's journey, but then they began to search for him among their relatives and acquaintances, ⁴⁵ and when they did not find him, they returned to Jerusalem, searching for him.  ⁴⁶ After three days they found him in the temple, sitting among the teachers, listening to them and asking them questions.  ⁴⁷ And all who heard him were amazed at his understanding and his answers.  ⁴⁸ And when his parents saw him, they were astonished. And his mother said to him, "Son, why have you treated us so? Behold, your father and I have been searching for you in great distress."  ⁴⁹ And he said to them, "Why were you looking for me? Did you not know that I must be in my Father's house? … ⁵¹…and He continued in subjection to them; and His mother treasured all these things in her heart.

Jesus was not disrespecting his earthly family. But he realized that His relationship with His Heavenly Father had to be His top priority. Please don’t misunderstand what I am saying. God created the family. He used family relationships like husband and wife, like parents and children, to illustrate His own love and care for the church. He talks about how a believing spouse can “sanctify” their unbelieving mate… They have a live-in missionary after all! If God so highly values families what is Jesus saying here?

       As important as “family” is, when you are “born again” you become part of something even more important: a spiritual family, you join the “forever family” of God…  Some need to make a choice when they believe in Jesus. In certain cultures, and in certain places, to identify yourself as a Christ follower may mean being rejected and disowned by your family. It seems that was not uncommon in the first century. In Mark 10:29-30 Jesus says you become part of another family when you believe…

Jesus said, “Truly, I say to you, there is no one who has left house or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or lands, for my sake and for the gospel,  ³⁰ who will not receive a hundredfold now in this time, houses and brothers and sisters and mothers and children and lands, with persecutions, and in the age to come eternal life…”

We are part of a new family, a spiritual family, when we put our trust in Jesus.  Yes, family is important, it is God’s design. But even more important is trusting and obeying God. It shows that by God’s grace we have been born into His “forever family.”

II. A New Reality: In Christ, we belong to God’s “Forever Family” (33-35).

³³ And he answered them, "Who are my mother and my brothers?"  ³⁴ And looking about at those who sat around him, he said, "Here are my mother and my brothers!  ³⁵ Whoever does the will of God, he is my brother and sister and mother."

       A key question: “Who are my mother and brothers?” Typical of His rabbinical style Jesus seizes the opportunity to teach His followers on the occasion of His family’s visit.  Also, typical for a first century rabbi, he introduces His teaching with a question designed to engage the attention of His listeners. Remember the context: first century Judaism. Family was foundational. Jesus intentionally is using a shocking “question” to make a point about the new spiritual reality that He was calling His followers to embrace. “My mother and brothers are here? Who are my mother and brothers?” Jesus is not denying His family, but he intentionally uses a surprising question to rivet the attention of those around Him. Sometimes we can use language that can hurt or offend unintentionally. Most of you know that our daughter is adopted (if you have not met her, the fact that she is Asian might give that away!). As she was growing up, through the years, we occasionally had people ask, “Do you know anything about her real parents?” I know there is no malice in that question, but a better term would be “birth parents.” We are her real parents. If you have trusted Christ you’ve been both born (John 3:3-5) and adopted (Gal 4:5,6) into God’s “forever family.” God is really our Father. We are not "like" a family, we ARE a family! We are really brothers and sisters. In fact, it is eternal, and that is about as real as it gets.  Jesus said that He must come before our biological family…

³⁴ "Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I have not come to bring peace, but a sword.  ³⁵ For I have come to set a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law.  ³⁶ And a person's enemies will be those of his own household.  ³⁷ Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me… (Matthew 10:34-37).

That may resonate more with some of you. How did your family react when you first believed? If they were believers, they surely rejoiced. But if they were not, they might have thought you were losing your mind, or had been lured into a cult! If you came from an orthodox Jewish family or from an Islamic family, they might have even disowned you. In some contexts in Iran or Afganistan or Pakistan it could be even worse, it could be a life or death decision. Later in this Gospel Jesus says that to follow Him we must be willing to take up our cross. We Americans don’t quite get that in the same way as believers in some other parts of the world. Jesus then follows His key question with…

       A Shocking statement: Here is my family! Mark contrasts Jesus’ family standing outside, and His followers sitting around Him. As precious are our family ties are to us, they don’t take priority over our commitment to God and His family (our spiritual family). Jesus clearly loved his family. We see that in the care He takes for Mary even as He hangs on the cross. But now He looks at those sitting around him, his followers, and He calls them His family.  Do you think about church that way?  Do you come here not to sit among strangers (or even acquaintances and friends!) but to be with your family?  

       A Vital Truth: Obedience to God rather than physical relationship, is the mark of family relationship in Christ. Look at verse 35, “Whoever does the will of God, he is my brother and sister and mother." Obedience demonstrates we are in his family. Spurgeon said,   “I will ever maintain that by grace we are saved, and not by ourselves; but equally must I testify, that where the grace of God is, it will produce fitting deeds.” Paul agrees…

⁸ For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God,  ⁹ not a result of works, so that no one may boast.  ¹⁰ For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them… (Ephesians 2:8-10).

We can’t boast, because “…of Him [by His doing] we are in Christ Jesus…” (I Cor 1:30a). It is all grace — God’s unmerited favor. But after we believed, God didn’t immediately take us into His presence… He left us in the world… He saved us on purpose, for a purpose. “Obedience” demonstrates our faith, it is an aspect of the “good works” for which we were created. And it is a visible testimony to the world that God has done a work in us, and we belong to Him. John wrote, “By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God and obey his commandments…” (I John 5:2).

What is God saying to me in this passage? God designed the family. It is a key aspect of His plan for humans, it is something we are right to cherish. But don’t miss what Jesus is saying here, don’t miss the Big Idea: Trusting and obeying God shows that by God’s grace we have been born into His “forever family.”

What would God have me to do in response to this passage? Remember the old song, “Trust and obey, there is no other way to be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey.” That is what we were created for, and it tells the world we are His. You may not have an extended “biological family” that is very present and active in your life. It may simply be geography. It may be that they haven’t yet believed and so because you have completely different world views, a certain “distance” has developed. If you know Christ, you are already part of God’s family. You are surrounded by brothers and sisters. Let’s live like the family we are: caring, loving, forgiving, fellowshipping, united in our love for our Father, choosing to love one another. What does that look like?

       One thing we can do is to choose to be together… In the early church, they broke bread from house to house, taking their meals together with gladness and sincerity of heart. Hospitality is a great way to get to know one another better, to share in each other’s lives. We can also meet together, prioritizing times like Sunday School or through the Wednesday night Bible Study or Thursday night virtual prayer meeting (both at 7 pm).  These are great opportunities to come together for sharing and fellowship, and for the Word and prayer. The format can vary, but the important thing is that we come together for “family time,” benefitting from the one another relationships and gifting, and together spend time with Father. 

       And remember the 12-year-old Jesus in the temple… we too need to be obediently engaged in the “family business,” bringing the Gospel of Christ to the people around us! The Missio Dei, God’s Mission in the world is being carried out through the church. That is you and me. If you have believed, you have a spiritual gift, not to store on a shelf, but to use to build each other up, and to reach the unsaved around us with the Good News of Jesus. What a privilege it is to pray that God, our Creator and Savior, would open the hearts of our family and friends, and by His kindness lead them to repentance and faith! And you are right there, as God’s ambassador, His missionary in residence. Be ready, and be available, it may be that God would use you to reach them! Let’s be about our Father’s business… because trusting and obeying God shows that we have been born into His forever family!          AMEN.